- Your best friend “likes” your sibling’s post on social media and you feel betrayed because you no longer speak to them.
- Your co-workers share pictures of their grandchildren and you quietly slip away before they can ask you about yours.
- Your latest heartbreak has left you reeling and you wish you could call your mom, but you know she won’t take your call.
- “You’re dead to me,” he cries out before slamming the phone down.
It’s your dirty little secret: you’re estranged from a loved one or lifelong friend.
It can last for a period of time or the rest of our lives, estrangement is the literal turning away or treating someone who was once close to us as a stranger. Common causes include divorce, dysfunctional family patterns or simply that your family doesn’t accept who you are. But, unlike your friends who’ve lost a loved one through death or divorce, you can’t talk about it because you’re embarrassed. Like it’s your fault or worse yet – you wonder if they’ll look at you and ask what’s wrong with you? Or maybe you just feel disloyal if you speak up against someone else.
So, instead of turning to others in a time of need, you turn inward – questioning, hurting and often waiting for the phone to ring to have a chance at reconnection.
Estrangement has become a silent and widespread epidemic in our society. Each of us has experienced an estrangement from someone at some point in our life. From the richest to the poorest, separation from a family member has become so commonplace – yet, most of us who are estranged from a loved one have no place to turn for support.
Supporting you to accept and let go of the situation.
Sometimes the hardest part about being estranged is that you have no control over the situation. Through compassionate guidance and support you can learn to let go and find acceptance – acceptance of yourself and acceptance of the situation. Understanding too that you’re not alone – that we all have looked in the mirror and asked ourselves “Why can’t I get along with my family like everyone else?” can help you heal and find comfort.
I know the pain of being separated from people I’ve cared deeply about. The drama, the cycle of connection and disconnection, the horrible self-doubt – it takes a toll. For much of my life, I was trapped in a game of dysfunction and commotion – buying into negative beliefs about who I was. With nowhere to turn for help, I used the constant back and forth to beat myself up and hold myself back. My health suffered, my other relationships suffered and my self-esteem was awful. I mean if my family couldn’t see I was important, how could I?
Working with children as a Guardian ad Litem for years I saw pain similar to my own – especially with children from bitter divorce battles. As a Master Integrative Life Coach & Reiki Healer, I became deeply aware of how many people really struggled with separation from others without any support. My passion has become helping people share and overcome the struggles that have kept them in the dark too long.
Learning about all the ways to explore and release the anger and pain in a healthy way is part of the process. I’ll show you what it means to truly surrender to what actually is happening, and even find gifts you might not have expected. You’ll learn what it means to have a healthy relationship with yourself and set clear boundaries – no matter the outcome.
Beyond the Break: Estrangement Support Group
This group is designed to help you give a voice to all the emotions you’ve been feeling in a safe, compassionate environment with others just like you. Over the course of course of first four weeks, you’ll learn:
- How to Give Yourself Permission to Feel and Release Anger
- Uncover the Story that Has Held You Back and Kept You Tied To Unhealthy Patterns
- What it Means to Truly Trust Yourself In a Healthy Way
- Take More Responsibility for Your Joy
- Have Faith to Accept and Surrender to What Truly Exists For You
In this workshop, we’ll share deeply about how estrangement impacts all the areas of your life and provide you with new tools to help you free yourself of the pain. The goal of this group isn’t to help you reconcile – but reconnect more deeply with who you are and what you need.
You’ll also be given an action step to help you integrate some of the material and show you how to release your true voice. The one that’s been in there all along and is waiting to get out and celebrate life again!
The next Beyond the Break: Estrangement Support Group begins May 9, 2017 and will meet at 7:30pm.
To register, please click here.
Spaces are limited so that this group may remain safe and intimate for sharing.
One-on-One Estrangement Coaching
Estrangement eats away at your self-esteem. Especially when you’re estranged from family members it can feel extremely disorienting – you hear the negative voices of your loved ones’ voice in your head and you begin to wonder, are they right? Am I the one who’s broken? Am I the one who’s cruel, stupid or wrong?
Discover how to release your true voice.
The one that supports you in making strong choices. In recognizing your beauty and strength instead of always beating yourself up. Right now, it might feel like the only way to heal your pain is to heal your broken relationship – but, what I’ve discovered is that before you can even decide whether you want to mend your relationship – you have to find out who you are and what you truly feel.
One-on-One coaching will guide you to completely accept yourself in new ways. Instead of believing the stories you were told, begin to explore all of who you are and how your estrangement might actually be the perfect catalyst to help YOU grow. Learn to set boundaries and let go of beliefs and actions that don’t belong to you.
Over the course of 13 weeks, we’ll use your torn relationship to discover gifts and lessons that will help you write the next chapter of your story. Exploring 7 spiritual laws to help you heal, you’ll discover how to:
- Separate the facts from the fiction of your life
- Accept the circumstances of your life without wishing they were different
- Stop the drama and the vicious back-and-forth cycles
- Learn to take responsibility and have healthy relationships
- Trust that your life has been perfectly designed for you to have everything you need
- Love and accept yourself – maybe for the first time in your life!
Coaching takes place over 60-75 minute confidential weekly telephone calls. Begin to release the pain that has held you back for far too long. Stop hiding from the shame and guilt of your estrangement.
Learn to make choices from a completely empowered place without the shadow of your separation.
Schedule a complimentary one-hour session and let’s begin to explore the ways we can talk about estrangement.